Welcome to the latest installment of a weekly contribution to the site by my husband, Thomas: Chasing Rabbits. In case you missed the first one, why Chasing Rabbits? My husband will be the first to admit that his thought process can be a bit…er…random. He starts in one spot, chases after some rabbits, sometimes all the way down the rabbit hole and back, but it
mostly usually always ends in a great place. But don’t take my word for it…
Hot Glue Guns go rata-tat-tat
I fail to see why hot glue guns have been given a reputation as a “woman’s” tool. It is a GUN that shoots out MOLTEN adhesive. In my eyes this qualifies as a grunt-your-ass-off man tool on every possible level.
The unspoken definition of a “manly” tool is to take something common and add power or danger to it. The perfect example of this mantality (see what I did there?) would be a pressure washer. Washing things is a woman’s work, but if you add a little gasoline and a couple thousand pounds of pressure, suddenly it becomes a manly chore. Don’t judge me, I don’t make the rules.
Anyway, back to hot glue guns. I have been using a hot glue gun almost daily since Thanksgiving. Not on any hobbies or anything I would consider fun, but as a tool to fix a nonstop parade of broken toys and decorations. So far I have reattached an arm to a giant snowman, put a head back on a reindeer, glued paint stirrers to the bottom of a cardboard mattress for a baby doll bed, fixed almost a dozen ornaments, and the list goes on and on. I never once felt less masculine while using my hot glue gun.
I am going to share a secret about my gender (shhhh). We like to feel needed, even if we let out a deep sigh, complain about it and blow you off until later. The easiest way for a man to feel needed, and get an instant sense of accomplishment is by fixing things that are broken around the house. Sure, my wife could have easily fixed any of the ornaments that were broken, but we have a dynamic. I fix things.
Imagine, a couple of your guy friends are sitting around with their little bottles of Elmer’s glue cranking out some super manly macaroni art with their little girls. Not only will their glue take all afternoon to dry, they had to exert all that energy squeezing the bottle. Such a waste! But you were smart. You hooked up your hot glue gun and had the picture complete in half the time. Not only did you finish early, it was dry half an hour before your friends, and the macaroni will never fall off the page!
A ghillie suit is perhaps the most manly of all camouflage. If you are not familiar with the term, a ghillie suit is a full body camo outfit designed to resemble heavy foliage. They are the ones with leaves and moss attached, rather than normal printed camo. It is impossible to create a ghillie suit without knowledge of SEWING and a HOT GLUE GUN. I know because I have looked up plans on how to make one before. It is a lot of work. John Rambo knows how to sew. Tell him that it’s a hobby for pansies and see what that’ll get you! I bet he would use a hot glue gun…
Perhaps if somebody created a hot glue gun that looked more like a pistol it would drum up more man interest. Put a magazine on the bottom that holds little glue rounds. Pew pew pew! Even bedazzling can be manly when you’re bustin’ a cap off in it! Word.
And now you know – hot glue guns are manly. As are staple guns. (I’m starting to see a trend here.) What are your go-to fixit items? Share it with us in comments so we know what else we need to buy!ghillie suit photo credit: ajd, mhd, njd, med & gsd via photopin cc glue gun photo credit: todbot via photopin cc